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Writers Mimi Wong, journalist Clarissa Wei, and the vast majority of women I spoke to for this piece (including me) were all targeted after being highlighted on “AZNidentity” — which frequently calls out Asian women its members disapprove of.

Officially, AZNidentity describes itself as “a Pan Asian (East, Southeast, South, Central) community against all forms of anti Asian racism.” Though some of the posts on the forum do focus on Asian identity and fighting racism, on the day I checked, 18 of the 30 most recent posts — and 20 of the 30 top posts of all time — explicitly discussed Asian women’s choice of sexual partners.

Whenever I upgrade my laptop, I copy them over, little packets of poison I must keep and carry forever.

I’ve gotten messages like this for more than four years, ever since my first novel — featuring a family with an Asian father and a white mother — was published and my own mixed family became public knowledge.

To this community, it’s a scarcity model: Asian women who succeed are accused of succeeding “at the expense of” Asian men.

The worst scarcity, they believe, is in the dating pool: Asian women who “marry out” are perpetuating the stereotype that Asian men are undesirable.

“Perhaps she settled for a black guy because she couldn’t snag a white boyfriend?

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But the outlook of the Asian men behind messages — and posts — like those above also echoes another group: white supremacists.I’d thought I was alone, or just unlucky, but as I spoke to other women — 13 for this piece — I realized it wasn’t just me.Targeted harassment from Asian-American men toward Asian-American women over choosing a non-Asian partner or having multiracial children, I discovered, is widespread, vicious, and devastating.They told me they reduced their internet presence afterward — making it harder to share their work and get new work.Some writers told me they shied away from writing about race, relationships, or identity. Although the messages come from many users, one particular subgroup on Reddit seems to be the root for most of this harassment.

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